Antonio Cromartie and the art of negotiation...now I understand how women find him so irresistible. With diplomacy like his, who needs wars?

Speaking of wars, Seahawks quarterback Matthew Hasselbeck was dead on asking the father of nine (from eight women) if he even knew what CBA stood for. The thing is, he didn't really. He apparently tweeted it, thought better of it and then deleted it.

No, no, no Matthew. If you're going to take the girl home, you have to finish the deal. Oh, and birth control is for losers, right Antonio?

Besides, how many of you would put good money down that if Antonio really was asked what "CBA" stood for he'd reply with: "condom broke accidentally"? I know I would.

So the Super Bowl is approaching and what's the story of the week? The Green Bay Packers not inviting players on IR to be a part of the team picture.

What ass honestly contemplated this issue and thought it would be wise to divide the locker room less than 14 days before the big game? Whoever it was should be sent packing and forced to labor on a dairy farm.

The New York Mets have yet to make a significant offseason move, and that might be ok. I mean, how many years have they dumped boatloads of cash on overrated players only to have them take strike three to end the NLCS? Anyone? Wow, tough room.

On the Yankees side of town, GM Brian Cashman just can't seem to do anything right when it comes to Derek Jeter.

First, there was initial wrangling over re-signing the Joe DiMaggio of this era. Now, he goes and shoots his mouth off about moving him to the outfield one day. How dare he?

Look Yankee fans, you may not want to hear this, but one day Derek is going to have to succumb to age. It doesn't tarnish his image or make him less of a Yankee. It makes him human.

Now if only Cashman can get Yankee fans to be rational.

Riiiiiight.